Guide to Better Sex

Those images of the ‘Perfect Macho Man and The Perfect Sensual Woman’ on the TV and in the Magazines make us feel that Sex instead of being a perfectly normal natural and enjoyable thing, is an ‘Act to be Performed to Perfection’. All this does it to add to the confusion and leads to unrealistic fears, expectations and fantasies.

Bad feelings about Sex and its consequences

• • Fear of pregnancy; Fear of pain; Fear of being caught/ heard/ or interrupted.
• • Performance Anxiety-Fear of failing to perform well.
• • Fear of losing control (during orgasm) and /or becoming vulnerable.
• • Looking unattractive during the climax.
• • Bad feelings about yourself or your body like, feeling that the body is unattractive.
• • Feelings that I am not successful (low self-esteem).
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You might also be interested in: Do's and Don'ts of a Healthy Sex Life

Problems in relationship

Anger/resentment against the partner should be resolved as it can decrease the performance and pleasure while having sex.

Unsuitable circumstances

While a ‘Quickie’ sometimes can be fun! But normally Good Sex requires a relaxed mind and body. Too much of a hurry, tiredness or preoccupation can rob you of the pleasures of Sex.

Performance anxiety

This is one of the most significant problems in the way of Good Sex. We often forget that Sex is something that comes naturally to all of us, instead, we seem to view ourselves as performers who have to complete an act to perfection.

Spectator role

Quite often we start observing ourselves as an audience, instead of really participating in it. – We observe ourselves ‘ doing the act’, as if on stage (now coming, now coming...., so again it doesn't,...I knew it…etc.).